dasblut311's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Mew? Randomly, I feel like crying. I mean, I cried a good long time last night, letting everything out and just had a little breakdown in my room. I feel so lonely. I have no friends here anymore. The people at school, no matter how hard I try, I can't manage to make friends with them. I mean, they start conversations with me and I try to stay into it, but I just can't. Then of course, I have my friends online and you know how I've been feeling as of late about that. I don't know how they really feel. Sure, I know what they type, but I don't know if they're being sincere. Don't get me wrong though, I love them to pieces and I want to be friends with them, it's just that I have that feeling consuming me. ::le sigh:: Then of course my friends from Mahopac are off to college and we never get to see eachother. Then, there's Katie who moved and I haven't heard from for months. Yes, Katie who's my best friend. I haven't heard from her and I just feel so lonely and (dare I say it) unloved by everybody. I know I have no good reason to feel this way, but I can't help it. I just need to know that I'm loved, I really do, because I really don't feel like I am. -- I hate feeling this way. I hate sounding like I'm so self-involved, I fucking hate it because that's not how I am. I'm truly not. Now, excuse me while I try to do something to get my mind off it all (I hate it when people sit around and pity themselves without doing something to stop it). 8:00 p.m. - 2003-09-03 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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